Weeelll???
I am blown away by the show of support and encouraging words from so many loved ones. My life path has led me through an array of some really freaking amazing people… from elementary school friendships, to once close but now distant relationships, to friends of friends. But the common human sentiments I have seen and felt literal heartwarming love from are compassion and concern. You can read, you can look, you can look away, but you take the time to share and encourage and for that I feel truly blessed. Call me a tad egocentric, but I could chalk it up to the fact that perhaps I have at one time or another influenced each person who chooses to read this or comment on FB. Maybe only recently have I become an influence or inspiration – wasn’t my mission but if that’s what I’ve done, than I am humbled. A diagnosis of cancer does not by its nature necessarily make one become an inspiration; I assume it’s the bravery, attitude or message that one might adopt when faced with a scary diagnosis is what matters. I too can learn from this and find ways to continue to be an inspiration even after this is far behind me. I also hope to document my observations and include them in my research project required for school. As an up and coming educator, I plan to influence many little lives and if making human connections is the key to influence/ inspiration, I may be on to something. Common Core/Career and College Readiness may just be lacking in the domains of human compassion and connection. Anyway…I know… quit rambling. To answer the big question- I am doing well. I’ll be honest, the first treatment was scary, but mostly because of the unknowns. What will it feel like? Will it hurt? When will I feel nauseous? Will I look sick? When will I lose my hair?!? I felt great last night; really nothing different than the ordinary late in the week drag. I slept well (thank you Xanax). Today I went for a Neulasta shot. That is administered the day after chemo and boosts the immune system by increasing white blood cell/bone marrow production. Side effects include aching joints, bones and muscles. Nurse said many patients describe flu-like symptoms and bone “throbbing” – sounds pleasant. Strangely, they recommend OTC Claritin (yes, the allergy med – they don’t know why, but it’s a pretty recent discovery from what they explained) and Tylenol or Advil. The nausea and overall stomach discomfort kinda goes along with that too.
I went to school today; I felt fine and had a pretty normal day. It’s great to keep busy, because it seems that in the quiet moments, I begin to ponder and ruminate ad nauseum. May have to make some changes in my placement as there are concerns about my immunity and ability to maintain good health being around so many young, germy students. I’m hoping to wait to see how I feel so that I can continue as long as possible. I also get a CBC blood draw on 4/1 to check my white blood count so that might help to assess the situation.
Right now I am beginning to feel a just tad nauseous and typical Friday tired but overall good. I appreciate the questions and suggestions, I may not always answer, but I read them all!
So life sucks sometimes, you’re surrounded by idiots, you might feel like crap, you’re stressed, depressed, busy, broke…whatever. Find your peace. Cheezy maybe, but it’s there. Trite, but that whole “it is in giving that we receive” thing? Yea, we need more of that. Thanks ya’ll for sharing your support. It means more than you can imagine. Cheezy mode… out. Love to ALL!!
Enjoy the various personalities of the hair. Here’s another one. I told you I can go Diana Ross… and this hasn’t even been touched by a comb!
